Today I’m going to talk about something that can be genuinely scary, but that also has tremendous potential to move your projects forward.
And that’s embracing being genuinely visible for who you are.
From the time we’re small, so many of us learn to Tone It Down.
Be less vocal. Less opinionated. Less female. Less Black. Less spectrum-y. Less gay. Less nonbinary. You get the idea.
Girls in particular (but it’s definitely not just girls) are coached to make themselves palatable. Convenient.
This is not advice that’s going to help you get the things you want from life.
This is advice that’s intended to make you malleable and easy to exploit.
What makes you weird probably makes you good
My mind was blown the other week when I caught Erika Tebbens’ podcast interview with Diane Wingert about ADHD and rejection sensitivity in sales.
You can grab a listen here (or a transcript is available on the same page)
Like a lot of people, I often jokingly refer to many of my annoying personality flaws as “ADD.”
But what if these are a manifestation of actual ADHD (not “ADD,”) — and maybe aren’t character flaws as much as inconvenient aspects of neurodivergence?
Whether you’re clinically ADHD, have some ADHD traits, or just exist on a complex human spectrum of brain wiring, this is a fascinating interview that might leave you with some ideas to pursue.
I also liked this podcast episode from Tara McMullin (formerly Gentile) on being an introverted, anxious, and autistic boss. (Transcript also available.)
Both of these woman, and countless other folks, show that being neurologically different can be an incredible superpower — as long as we don’t pretend that it’s always going to be easy.
Most of us, whatever our brain wiring, have something like that going on. Stay open to the possibility that what makes you weird might also be what makes you wonderful.
Caution: You might want to be careful with this if your weirdness is that you think vaccines make you magnetic, or that watching YouTube makes you smarter than reading books.
Putting dumb into the world tends to attract more dumb, and honestly I think we’re probably all set on that count.
The brand identity mullet
So this week I had an interesting interaction with a company that sells a service I need.
The price was great. The product looked like the exact right thing. And the website looked big and established.
All good so far. But it turns out the company isn’t big and established — it’s little, scrappy, and full of promise.
It occurred to me that their brand was sporting the equivalent of a mullet: Business up front, party in the back.
(OK, “party” isn’t really the right word for that intense period of brutally hard work, panic, and adrenaline when you’re getting a company going, but you get the idea.)
So many companies-of-one and feisty little startups fall into this trap of wanting to look like they’re a lot bigger than they are.
The problem is, a brand that looks ultra established also attracts customers looking for a product that’s as polished as the front-end website is.
Those buyers are in the market for something dead stable. Maybe even a bit boring.
(Some things are better when they’re boring. Web hosting, colonoscopies, democracy.)
If you’re at a stage where you’re gathering early adopters, embrace the hell out of that. Make it a virtue.
If people are going to see some little bumps and flaws, let them know before they get there. Invite customers into the adventure of growing something amazing with you.
Not in a train-wreck way. In an exciting way that highlights the benefits (lots of individualized attention, passion, and willingness to embrace new ideas) to the right kind of buyer.
That’s how you turn early customers into raving fans, instead of pissy refund demands.
PSA: It’s ok to take care of yourself
Finally, something I think is really important:
You don’t owe the world personal details about your life.
If you want to keep something private, you don’t need my permission — or anyone else’s — to do that.
One interesting option is to be transparent about everything except your actual name. Johnny Truant wrote a nice article on Copyblogger about how using a pseudonym freed him up to be more direct, more outspoken, and more personal.
” …the minute I ceased using my real name, I started writing what was true and genuine.”
But that’s just one option. Becoming more visible and authentic will help other folks who struggle with a path that looks like yours. But the choice about when (if ever) to come forward is yours alone.
Big fun is coming soon
Here’s a hint …
“There’s a hundred and four days of summer —”
That’s a truncated first line of a song, and it’s going to lead into the theme for next week’s issue and the rest of the summer here at The Fierce.
Much more on that next week. Until then, stay Fierce!
Sonia
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